The 2024 installment of the A to Z Challenge has come to an end and my aspirations to take part did as well, but long before April passed me by.
What was supposed to have been a slow month was anything but. I fully intended on making the rounds, while adding my own stamp on the challenge but it wasn't meant to be. Life got busier and when I had a moment to myself, I was too exhausted (mentally) to add anything here. For the few that chime in regularly, please accept my apology. I wanted to get this done and even more so, I wanted to support you in your journey as well.
For what it's worth, here is one last entry for the challenge, albeit late.
An Idiot's Guide to Randomness.
"Hope is such a sweet misery." - Hadiya Shaikh
A poem, written circa 1999.
Sweet Misery
One day my dear, You will be in my arms, Kissing on sandy shores.
At the moment, when moments heighten,
I will climb to you.
I will be present until my heart pumps dry.
I will protect you,
I will honor you,
I will serenade you and become one with your soul.
I know! I'm a bit "all over the place" currently. My goal was to post daily, starting with A and ending with Z. IN ORDER! That hasn't worked out. I will catch up but in the meantime, I'll be jumping out of order to do so.
The random word generator is throwing me some doozies.
"Cosmic terror appears as an ingredient of the earliest folklore of all races and is crystallized in the most archaic ballads, chronicles and sacred writings." H.P. Lovecraft
Not long ago, I volunteered to assist Shannon Lawrence in publicizing her new work entitled, Myth Stalker: Wendigo Nights (Hit the link, buy the book. Yay! Free pub!) and for my entry, I was asked to share a post concerning a cryptid or a figure of mythological folklore (I chose Mothman) and while researching the topic, I found myself becoming more interested in others that I had heard of but was not familiar with. Here are two.
Folklore, as defined by Marriam Webster is as follows:
1. Traditional customs, sayings, tales, dances, or art forms preserved among a people. 2. An often unsupported notion, story or saying that is widely circulated.
There are three main genres of folklore, material folklore (physical objects), verbal folklore (common sayings, expressions, stories and songs) and customary folklore (beliefs and the way of doing things).
Folklore is a broad topic, with several examples from a plethora of cultures, which have their own unique twist on the stories of the past, but what I found common in most is that they all have tales of mythological creatures, cryptids and gods.
The Wendigo (Of course I started here)
The Wendigo originated in Algonquin folklore and is said to be a malevolent spirit that possesses human beings, filling them with an insatiable hunger, driving them to eat other humans. Being possessed by a Wendigo indwells the unfortunate soul with a propensity to commit murder.
Basil H. Johnston described the Wendigo as such:
"The Wendigo was gaunt to the point of emaciation, its desiccated skin pulled tightly over its bones. With its bones pushing out against its skin, its complexion the ash-gray of death, and its eyes pushed back deep into their sockets, the Wendigo looked like a gaunt skeleton recently disinterred from the grave. What lips it had were tattered and bloody. Unclean and suffering from suppuration of the flesh, the Wendigo gave off a strange and eerie odor of decay and decomposition, of death and corruption."
Charming fellow, if I say so myself!
The Phoenix
The Phoenix is an immortal bird that cyclically regenerates, or is born again by rising from the ashes of it's predecessor. It has ties to several mythologies (Greek, Persian and Egyptian, too name a few) and it's origin is heavily debated. Today, the Phoenix signifies rebirth or the beginning of a new life. Being one that enjoys written work and poetry, I found the excerpt below interesting: (Precepts of Chiron, attributed to the Greek poet, Hesiod)
"A chattering crow lives now nine generations of aged men, but a stag's life is four time a crow's, and a raven's life makes three stags old, while the phoenix outlives nine ravens, but we, the rich haired Nymphs daughters of Zeus the aegis holder, outlive ten phoenixes." (I guess, if your in to math, would equal a lifetime of 972 times the span of a humans.)
Who's a pretty bird?
The myth of these creatures is entertaining, if nothing else. If you find that you are interested in mythology and cryptids, you should check out Wikipedia's link on the subject.
Creedence Clearwater Revival - Bad Moon Rising (Cuz, American Werewolf In London. Duh!)
"Necessity has been a priceless spur which has helped men to perform miracles against incredible odds." - Orison Swett Marden
The story, as it is told, is that David defeated Goliath, with a sling and a stone. Insurmountable odds. The strong against the "weak." A story of faith. Some choose to live without faith and I will not argue against your reasoning. Some read the Word, but don't live by it. I know a few. I will cast my lot with them. I will not preach here, but I will not hide behind the vail of this fallen world either. I teeter on the edge of faith and the lack thereof daily, but I also know that deep within my soul, faith resides. It was hand stitched into my being. My Goliath is well documented and I will not run from it.
I have recently started decluttering and clearing out old boxes that had been stored and happened upon an old notebook of sketches and scribbles from long ago. A buddy of mine (we will call him B) and I used to sit atop the roof of his rental and write whatever came to us. Back then, I had dedicated a decent amount of time to writing poetry. There was a freedom in putting pen to paper and it also aided in calming the restlessness of being a young adult, trying to navigate life. That old notebook would go with me where ever I went and when inspiration would hit, I'd jot down the thought and rehash it at a later date. At the time, I had no idea how these pieces, written so long ago and before I had experienced real struggle, would come back to meet me on the road that I am currently travelling.
"When you dance with the devil, the devil doesn't change. The devil changes you." - Amanda Hocking
A poem, written circa 1999.
The Dance
I lay my weary head upon a soft retreat.
The dance begins.
The devil gnashes his teeth atop my left shoulder,
while God rests patiently upon the right.
Sad man, tired man,
What is your plan?
To sleep me away
Until you wake again?
Your mind is water,
as you drown in the deep.
And you know, as well as I,
there is a means to an end
beneath where you sleep.
Pay no mind to his ramblings!
His words are no more than the blowing of a chilled wind.
I'm tired.
Rest child.
I drift into darkness,
but still hear his call.
Alone in a dream,
I rest but still fall.
We twist, we turn,
our thoughts intertwine,
trapped in slumber,
for brief moments in time.
We awake and prepare,
for the next day begins.
Only to dance,
upon the sunlight,
ending again.
How does a seemingly random thought, born approximately twenty-five years ago, hold so much weight today? I wrote this piece when life was simple and drama free. The only real pain I had experienced was the passing of my grandfather in 1992. It's odd, to me, how life comes full circle.
Allow me to introduce you to one of my favorite artists, Ren Gill.
As with most of my posts, I will leave you with a musical piece, but be warned, there is some vulgarity and the lyrical content is intense, in my opinion. I implore you to listen to the entire song, especially the last minute and a half. Ren speaks truth and does not hold his tongue. Keep "The devil on one shoulder and God on the other" in mind while taking this song in. It is worth your time and I do hope you enjoy. It fits perfectly with the subject matter.
PSA: I skipped the letter "C" because I am still working through it but will post when finished.
In society today, violence is all around us. We are inundated with it. We see it in the morning AND evening news. It is glorified in Hollywood and at times, we see it in front of our very eyes. We breathe it in like oxygen. The boundaries between information and fascination have blurred. It is big money and it has become a contest. Push the gore further, be more and more deranged. Make it stick in peoples crawl. Why is society in love with bloodshed and what affect does it have on our thinking?
"No society that feeds its children on tales of successful violence can expect them not to believe that violence in the end is rewarded." - Margaret Mead
1984. "One, two, Freddy's coming for you. Three, four, better lock your door. Five, six, grab your crucifix. Seven, eight, better stay up late. Nine, ten, never sleep again."
I was ten years old and the chant above was burned into my memory. My mind was processing information at an alarming rate but the entries were normal fodder for my age at the time. Every single image that I consumed was locked away and stored in my subconscious. I was innocent. I was protected and sheltered. I was safe. I did not know what violence was. Life revolved around Smurfs and Pound Puppies, Gleaming the Cube and racing BMX. Horror was reserved for late night viewing and for grownups only. "A Nightmare" was my introduction to horror and I didn't like it, but liked it at the same time. As the years passed, I had watched the classics and didn't mind but as the violence intensified and the realism evolved, I began to drift away from the genre, only catching pieces of a few here and there. My thought process went from "It's harmless viewing." to "How do people come up with these ideas?" and I concluded that I didn't want to know.
My penchant for obsessive thinking completely shifted this paradigm. Having intrusive thinking is difficult to navigate and while in the midst of a negative cycle, you have difficulty separating fiction from fact. The idea of physically harming someone makes me ill and when I obsessed about the possibility, it was gut wrenching. In my experience, time (too much of it) would pass and the symptoms subsided, but it didn't take much to trigger another response. Through trial (and a bunch of error) I realized that violence, in any form, was a trigger and needed to be removed completely.
"How do people come up with these ideas?"
I used to sigh in defiance when my father would express his opinion about the fall of society, but even in my small act of rebellion, I heard his words. I am unwilling to admit it, but I am starting to align myself with his believes and until people realize that drastic change is necessary, we will continue to witness violence and it will only escalate further as time passes. I do not have answers on what needs to be done but know that it will only get worse. Mass shootings, unheard of in my teens, are now commonplace and the media loves to drown us with the who's and why's. This only fuels the desire for those with evil intentions. It is no longer a question of if it will happen again, but when? Some will blame video games and others blame Hollywood but I place blame solely on the individuals that carry out the act. Mental illness is real and some hide behind it's vale. I was one of those types but there comes a time when you need to slip each leg into your jeans and work through the issue. It took the death of a loved one and the loss of another to make me realize that true happiness is hard work and just because your lot in life is difficult, there is no excuse to give up, commit criminal acts and God forbid, take another's life.
Music cures my restlessness and I incorporate it in life daily. I allow the words to wrap around my mind but it does not encourage what I do. It is an escape from the noise surrounding me. I like edgy and I gravitate toward musicians that are not afraid to admit and discuss struggle. I have an internal soundtrack of hundreds of thousands of songs and when I write, some of these pieces remind me of the subject matter.
Be warned, the song below is violent but I am sharing it because it fits the topic of this entry. I do not spew vulgarity on The Hobbit but the musical entries may.
A diagnosis of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. Overwhelming anxiety, caused by violent, intrusive thinking. A potent regiment of medication (several). Two separate, one week stints in a behavioral hospital because I could not shake the believe that I would harm the ones I love. An overwhelming feeling of inadequacy and intense difficulty opening up to those closest to me. The sudden death of my mother. A divorce and yet, I remain.
I am still Alive.
"There is still a war going on within me, but things have changed. I'm no longer trying to destroy myself, I'm on a rescue mission now." - Just A Poet Guy
Some people float through life believing that all will be okay. Some have had it much easier and do not fret about tomorrow because, for them, the sun will always rise. A normal person has the ability to compartmentalize issues as they confront them, but that was not me. I would feel every action, every word, every comment and take that negativity intensely personal. Internally, it would create a range of mental and physical side effects that would intensify if not worked through immediately. It may start with a seemingly harmless thought or the idea that I have made an overwhelming mistake. I would ruminate on the lie and experience unbearable anxiety. My will to be "perfect" was not attainable, and I knew it, but it didn't stop me from trying. My stomach would begin to cramp and cause nausea. The thoughts would run away like a freight train and linger for days. In my darkest times, I questioned my sanity and even more so, my will to continue on. I would roll off of the couch upon waking and make a bee line to the medicine cabinet. The thought of missing a dose was uncomforting.
This continued for close to nineteen years. Like clockwork, I'd take those pills, searching for a synthetic happiness that would never materialize. It kept the obsessive thoughts at bay, mostly, but left me numb and not able feel much of anything.
The death of my mother in February of 2022, followed by the separation in March of 2023, I thought, was finally going to do me in.
I found myself lying on a bed, contemplating whether I could continue on and as I had almost reached my decision, the thought of my daughter, growing up without me, caused pause. And then a voice rang out, and it was not my own. The words continue to echo, "KEEP BREATHING!" I knew who spoke those words. I had not heard that phrase before but it reminded me of an exercise that I would complete in the past to combat intrusive thinking. Muster up the courage to inhale deeply and upon exhaling, envision the thought exiting. I continued this exercise for an hour, and with every exhale, I gained courage. "Get busy living, or get busy dying."
Now, free of medication and realizing that I do not lack strength, I am going to take all of those painful words, every hurtful remark, every intrusive lie told, every mistake made and the memory of all of that hurt, pile them high, strike a match and watch those memories burn to the ground! And on that pile of ash, I will build a new.
I know it's a couple of days late but late is better than never!
I'll begin by introducing myself and by providing a brief summation of my story.
My name is Nate, also known as ib (Idiot Box).
Circa 2012, this blog was created to shed light on the negative stigma of mental illness and my struggles with obsessive thinking and anxiety. I had posted regularly for approximately two/three years but lost my way. After a long hiatus, I returned to the scene and started dumping my baggage on this site for the world to see, yet again. Previously, I posted on others' blogs as a guest and took part in several hops and challenges. One challenge that I enjoyed back then was the A to Z Challenge. After so many years of being silent and after enduring some major life changes, I decided to enter the fray again. Upon my return, I realized that I enjoy writing and even more so, I enjoy being involved with other creatives and offering up support when they are experiencing their own trials and tribulations. So, here I am. Free of obsessive thinking and anxiety and ready for what's to come.
I have completely removed all of the older material and redesigned the page to incorporate a fresh start.
My theme for 2024 is admittingly different and will be entitled "An Idiot's Guide to Randomness".
Currently, life is busy and even after two months of brainstorming, I couldn't nail down a theme for the 2024 A to Z Challenge on my own, so I took to Google. (I don't put stock in AI but needed help and Google is always right, RIGHT?) After sifting through several possibilities, I found that there wasn't one that I would be able to commit twenty-six posts to in the span of one month so instead of waiting for inspiration, I made an executive decision and will let chance decide.
For each letter of the alphabet, I will generate five words and from those, choose the juiciest one supplied and post something pertaining to it. I may tell a related personal story or a completely random something or other but THERE WILL BE A POST!
I'm a bit late in posting this so I apologize. Let's get right to it!
As a child, I simply could not grasp the vastness of the earth and the billions of living organisms dwelling on it. This inability to wrap my mind around these simple facts planted a seed in the deep recesses of my thinking. How many things are still out there that we have not yet found and is it possible that some of the tales regarding cryptids and mythological creatures are true? And even if they are difficult to believe in, isn't it fun to allow the mind to escape and imagine the possibilities?
Vampires have long been my favorite mythological creature. I have watched movies, read books and even watched anime with vampiric story lines but along the way, I have found other cryptids to be enjoyable to learn of as well. Everybody has heard the tale of Nessie, a dinosaur sized lake monster of Scottish folk lore roaming "mostly" undetected in Loch Ness. Or, maybe you fancy a "goat sucker", also known as a Chupacabra. Whatever your flavor is, there are enough to go around but let's dive in to one that I have recently found interesting!
Mothman
My interest in Mothman began not long ago, after watching the movie, The Mothman Prophecies, starring Richard Gere. Before the viewing, I had heard bits and pieces of the legend but had never taken the time to research it's origin.
Estimated to stand in excess of seven feet tall and display a wingspan of approximately ten feet wide, Mothman is said to be covered by dark gray or white fur covering a muscular build, an oddly shaped head, hypnotic red eyes and bird like in appearance. Some sightings suggest that while in flight, Mothman is able to maneuver through wooded areas at high speed.
The first known sighting of Mothman in the United States is said to have been reported in Point Pleasant, WV in the mid 1960's. It's origin and existence has been debated heavily since with possible sightings ranging from Chicago, IL to Argentina.
The Shawnee Tribe, who once inhabited the region now known as West Virginia, spoke of stories referring to the "Winged Man". It's presence brought impending despair and doom. It is said that when Mothman is near, the feeling of unease and fear overwhelms those in it's presence.
In December, 1967, The Silver Bridge, connecting Point Pleasant to the Ohio boarder, collapsed, killing forty-six people. It is believed that Mothman was responsible for the tragedy but there are some that believe the creature was present to warn of the upcoming disaster.
Several sightings in Point Pleasant have been recorded but there is also no hard evidence of it's existence.
Besides the movie mentioned above, there are several articles and books written on the Mothman phenomena. I recommend starting with the entry on Wikipedia.
While we are on the subject of cryptids and mythical creatures, have you heard of the Wendigo?
If not, please allow me to share the name of one who can touch on the subject, Author Shannon Lawrence. I have been given an opportunity to spread the word regarding her upcoming release, Myth Stalker: Wendigo Nights
A late night call from her mentor sends Selina Moonstone on a mission to Canada, determined to track down a Wendigo and exterminate it.
Accustomed to facing off with the all too real creatures of Native American lore, Selina discovers the Wendigo is someone close to her, forcing her to change gears from destruction to frantic search for a cure. There's no known way to rid a person of the Wendigo spirit once it has begun the consumption of the victim's soul, a lesson she learned the hard way in her youth. With her loved one's transition to Wendigo imminent, Selina must fight her own lifelong training as a Myth Stalker and find another way. She gathers a mismatched group of allies, including a charming Sin Eater and a conceited mercenary Cryptid hunter from her past, and embarks on a mission to find a solution before it's too late.
Myth Stalker: Wendigo Nights will be released on March 26, 2024 in paperback and e-book on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Kobo and more at https://books2read.com/u/4AaOJd
To find out more about Shannon's release and other interests, visit The Warrior Muse.
Thanks for stopping by the Hobbit. Please join me in supporting Shannon in the hard earned release.
It's the first Wednesday of the month and only the lucky few know what that means!
INSECURE WRITERS SUPPORT GROUP DAY! YAY!
IWSG was created to provide a safe haven for writers to air their concerns and fears without appearing foolish or weak. All skill levels are welcome, from published authors to those like myself, that enjoy creating but have not acquired the courage to release their work to the masses.
A big thank you to Alex J. Cavanaugh is in order. He created this group long ago and has continued to support writer's in their quest to achieve writing success, no matter how big or small.
I would also like to thank the awesome co-hosts for this months addition.
Each month, a question is presented to the group and those that don't mind answering provide insight on the topic being addressed. Answering the question is always optional.
Today's question: Have you "played" with AI to write those nasty synopses or do you refuse to go that route? How do you feel about AI's impact on creative writing?
Back in October 2023, a similar question was asked on the topic of AI. My answer has not changed but if you would like, you can travel back in time to here!
If you get tired of the droning, feel free to skim through this or abandon it altogether. I completely understand.
I do not like the idea of substituting human thinking with artificial intelligence. We have become so horribly dependent on technology in society, as a whole, that we have abandoned the need to perform basic skills. I do not mean to downplay the importance of the internet and advancements in technology, but do not want to think about a future where our ability to create is replaced by something artificial. I can see how AI might assist in sparking an idea if you are in throws of a brain fart and cannot conjure up an idea naturally, but in order to complete a work, it should always include good old fashioned brain power and human emotion. At birth, we were given the innate ability to think and create using our minds. Science tells us that we only use ten percent of our brain on average. Imagine the possibilities if we were able to increase that percentage by only five percent. The internet was created by the human mind and almost all other advancements throughout history were as well.
I should probably tinker around with AI to be more informed but I don't wanna!
"This is your last chance. After this, there is no turning back. You take the BLUE pill, the story ends. You wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe.
You take the RED pill, you stay in Wonderland and I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes!"
Thank you Morpheus, RED pill please!
P.S...You will see a of months worth of posts in April if you venture back.
I am going to participate in the A to Z Challenge, which was created by Arlee Bird long ago. I'll be entering the fray for the first time in years. If you haven't already, click the link and join. It's a blast!
This years theme will be revealed on March 10, 2024. I hope to see you all there.
The first Wednesday of every month should, in my humble opinion, be enacted as a federal holiday. Why, might you ask? Because it is "Insecure Writer's Support Group" day! On this day, writers of every level, published or not, can air their concerns, fears and doubts in a space that fosters support and helpful tips without the feeling of embarrassment or humiliation. If you haven't already, visit the sign in page here and join the group.
As always, I will begin by thanking it's creator, o' ninja captain, my ninja captain, Mr. Alex Cavanaugh.
And with that, "Let's Rock The Neurotic Writing World!"
I'll start by admitting that I haven't posted in a couple of months but it was a planned break. I'll touch on the reason for my absence soon. A post is already in the works, just not completed.
Today's Question: What turns you off when visiting an authors website/blog? Lack of information? A drone of negativity? Little mention of the authors books? Constant mention of books?
I must admit, I didn't know how to answer this question at first. I have not visited any authors personal sites until rejoining this group. The few that I have accessed are owned by those that contribute here. I enjoy hearing news on releases, the successes of each individual and to have the opportunity to provide support when I feel that I have something positive to add. I am inexperienced (an amateur's amateur, really) at best regarding anything related to literature and do not have the experience/knowledge to critique another's space or work. I do not like leaving negative reviews in any capacity so normally, I will only comment if it is positive and well intended. One thing that I do not like is an over abundance of pop ups and ads. I get that some use this medium to generate revenue but the constant flashing and ill timed pop up advertising "testosterone cream" is a bit annoying. I also would not enjoy unneeded and derogatory comments regarding my work. I put a lot of myself in to these posts and doubt I'd take kindly to being badgered because of the content. I have not experienced this yet but if I climb the mountain and publish something, I will no doubt receive criticism. I am already worried about my short stories subject matter and do not doubt that it will ruffle some feathers.
It feels good to contribute to this group and hope that I can continue. I plan on hopping around and seeing others takes on this months subject. Have a blessed day!
For me, motivation is hard to come by at times. Life is busy and during the holiday season, it is magnified two fold. I get excited when people that I have met through blogging hold a challenge of their own or merely mention one that they are contributing to. It provides me with a direction to follow for crafting a post that would otherwise not exist. I want to keep moving forward and to stay in touch without always having to concoct something from nothing, hoping that it catches on. I am not always able to put myself in the right headspace to write but I want to stay engaged and at times, I need help from others to do so. I came across a bit of unsolicited help today, thanks to Tyrean Martinson.
I have been tuning in to creatives that contribute to IWSG since I returned earlier this year and Tyrean is one of them. My reasoning is two fold. I need to arm myself with what others have experienced in their own journey. Reading the work of others creates a drive in me that I cannot muster on my own. I need constant reminding that the work will be worth it and that I am capable. (I guess I am still a little needy in this aspect.) It helps me focus. I also hope to build my own site and one of the best ways to do so is to follow and actively participate with others that are trying to make a go of the writing game.
I don't know if Tyrean meant to start a challenge when she posted her November 17 entry but I am going to accept it as such and roll with it.
I'll begin by sharing what I am thankful for.
MY LITTLE GIRL
Sweetie, you may never read this, but you bring an unconceivable amount of joy to my heart. A joy that cannot be quantified by using mortal words. You have my complete attention and until I return to the dirt, that will not change. You are a burning light in the darkness, my dear. I simply would be unable to carry on without you. Dada loves you more than anything on this earthly plain.
FAMILY
To say that the last eighteen months have been turbulent is an understatement. It has become blatantly clear to me that I need my family. My father and sisters hold a dear place in my soul. I could go on about each of them but this post would never end. My mother, who passed in February 2022, is missed dearly. She fought fearlessly for her family. Where there was once an unwavering love, there is now a tangible void in the same. Her words and loving embrace still reverberate in the depths of my soul.
FRIENDS (Extended Family)
Some have passed away and some have decided to leave but the few that matter, the core group, remain. Over the years, we have stayed in contact but getting together had proven difficult. Obligations to family and scheduling conflicts had filled in the once empty time slots. Now that our children are grown and are not as dependent on us, we are able to reconnect more regularly and it feels good to have the boys back in the fold. They are not blood, but they might as well be. I would have never made it through my twenties and thirties without them. And now, in our forties, I cannot thank them enough for extending a hand and being fully engaged when needed.
Books (Series) That I Am Thankful For (In no particular order.)
1. This Beautiful Mess - Rick McKinley
2. Walking With Arthur - James O'Donnell
3. Messy Spirituality - Michael Yaconelli
4. The Hobbit/Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien
5. Wheel of Time (Series) - Robert Jordan (I must add an addendum here. I petered out on Fires of Heaven but plan on restarting/finishing the entire series.)
6. The Wayfarer Redemption (Trilogy) - Sara Douglass
7. Brain Lock - Jeffrey M. Schwartz
8. Left Behind (Series) - Tim LaHaye & Jerry B. Jenkins (Again, petered out. My favorite characters starting getting knocked off and I got frustrated. Planning on restarting/finishing.)
9. The Blood Gospel - James Rollins & Rebecca Cantrell
10. Where The Red Fern Grows - Wilson Rawls (I sob every time. Last time with my daughter, a couple of years back. Grade school assignment. I am a sap.)
11. The Iron Tower - Dennis L. McKiernan
12. The Shack - William P. Young
A to Z - Artists (Bands) That I am Thankful For
A. Audioslave
B. Blind Melon
C. Chevelle
D. Death Cab for Cutie
E. Everclear
F. Ben Folds
G. G. Love & Special Sauce
H. Ben Harper
I. Incubus
J. Jack Johnson
K. The Killers
L. Live
M. Mutemath
N. Nirvana
O. O.K. Go
P. Pearl Jam
Q. Queens of The Stone Age
R. Ren
S. Staind
T. Tool
U. Underoath
V. Violent Femmes
W. Weezer
X. (Uhhh, nothing for X)
Y. (Errr, nothing for Y)
Z. The Zutons
So, there you have it. A teeny glimpse into me and what I am thankful for. If there is something in the lists above that you have not read or listened to, I implore you to give it a go. I do not think I have horrible taste. And if you haven't already, stop by Tyrean's blog and post a couple of things that you are thankful for.
Once again, we find ourselves offering support to those of us that put our words and thoughts out there for the world to see. It's IWSG time again and I cannot begin without thanking our ninja captain extraordinaire, Alex J Cavanaugh for starting this group.
Cast your doubts and fears aside! Unbelievable support and guidance can be found write (See what I did there) here when joining this group.
Today's Question: November is National Novel Writing Month! Have you ever participated? If not, why not?
I'll be honest. I was unaware that November was National Novel Writing Month. I had to search it out after seeing the question for this installment of our group. Needless to say, I will most likely be joining.
Surrounding myself with more tools and writers cannot be a bad thing. I am an infant in this game and doubt myself at every turn but I have forced pen to paper or fingers on the keys, I suppose, to keep pushing on. My goal is to post something once a week on Habitual Hobbit but I normally fall woefully short. It is not because I don't want to, I just want to post bits that mean something, whether it is for my own spewing or not.
Anyone that happens to read this post, I would like to know more about NaNoWriMo so shoot me an email or add your thoughts in comment form.
It's that time of year again! Spooky season! And while I do not care much for it, I decided to do a bit of research and share my thoughts on this "spookiest" of celebrations.
As a child, I enjoyed sauntering from door to door in search of a big candy score. My crew and I would hustle around the neighborhood in an attempt to hit as many houses as possible to maximize our haul. In early September, the anticipation would begin building and plans were laid out for who or what we were going to don as costumes. While it was enjoyable creating those memories, I really never thought much about it's meaning and why it was celebrated. I understand the meaning behind the "big five" as they pertain to me. Christmas is a day to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ. Thanksgiving, as I was taught in grammar school, was a day to celebrate the peaceful gathering of the Pilgrims and Wampanoag People. It was a day to enjoy fellowship with loved ones and overeat, nap, catch some football and pass out from a food coma. I have since come to a deeper understanding. To me, Thanksgiving is a time for us to praise God for the blessings he has provided to us. Easter marks the resurrection of Jesus Christ, three days after the crucifixion. Memorial Day is a day to remember our fallen soldiers that set their own well being aside to protect our freedoms here at home and Veterans Day is day to give thanks to those who served or serve in the armed forces. The others are self explanatory. But, why Halloween? After doing a little research, I found more information pertaining to the holiday than I thought I would!
Is Halloween considered a Christian holiday or a Pagan holiday? Is it neither? Is it both?
I simply started by Googling "Halloween meaning" and was surprised at the abundance of articles concerning this topic. I'll apologize in advance, I linked the crap out of this post so you can dive further in if you feel so inclined.
I found one article written by Caroline Picard and Lizz Schumer with Good Housekeeping to be particularly interesting. Click the links if you would rather read it for yourself but the bullet points I found most interesting are as follows: It is believed that Halloween originated a couple thousand years ago by the Celtic people (Pagans) to celebrate Samhain. During this time, it is believed that the barrier between worlds of the living and the dead is thinner, allowing for easier communication between the living and loved ones that have passed on. People would don animal skins and heads during the festivities. Maybe that explains why we wear costumes today?
An article written by Ian Palmer and Terri Robertson in Country Living breaks down a more Christian approach and attempts to answer questions on whether or not Halloween has biblical ties.
In Christianity, it has been widely argued on each end whether or not it should be celebrated by followers of Christ. The word "Hallow" translates into "Holy" in Old English. All Saints Day is a Christian (Catholic origins) holiday where Saints are celebrated on November 1st, followed by All Souls' Day on November 2nd where loved ones that have passed on are remembered. All Hollows Eve (Halloween) is the Eve of All Saints Day.
Wikipedia's entry is interesting also and covers a broader summation, touching on Secular and Christian differences and what the day means in many other belief systems and peoples across the world. One common theme, it seems, is that the day is celebrated to honor the dead. That may explain why it has taken on a spookier tone related to ghosts, witches, devils and the like. It is also a time when horror movies see an uptick in release and viewing. My 16 year old daughter has recently taken a liking to the genre. I tend to steer clear of the violence depicted in these films because it doesn't play well with obsessive thinking. My mantra has been "If you put junk in, you get junk out." I simply do not need any help creating another avenue for negativity. I do well enough on my own.
There is so much more I wanted to touch on here but decided to keep it to a minimum. This post would never end. I simply wanted to educate myself in regards to the roots of the holiday and why we celebrate it. I do not lean heavily to either side of the argument and do not think less of those that enjoy it. When my daughter was a wee little lass, I experienced so much joy seeing the excitement that she experienced while watching the candy get dropped in the bucket. It brought back memories of my childhood and the enjoyment of Halloween I had as a kiddo.
I'll leave you with a song of antiquity. "Nightmare On My Street" - DJ Jazzy Jeff and The Fresh Prince
It is time, yet again, for the monthly installment of The Insecure Writer's Support Group. On the first Wednesday of every month, those that have signed up for the blog hop have an opportunity to talk candidly about the writing journey without fear of appearing foolish or weak. Those that have been through the fire can offer assistance and guidance. It is a safe haven for writer's of all kinds.
Today's Question: The topic of AI writing has been heavily debated across the world. According to various sources, generative AI will assist writers, not replace them. What are your thoughts?
"Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere." - Albert Einstein
I'll be honest. I am not sure that I like the thought of writing derived by artificial intelligence. I do not have any experience with it and I don't plan on giving it a roll. I understand what it is but do not know much about it. We are so dependent on technology that it seems like we are straying away from what makes the art so incredible. Knowing that a story or imaginary world has been completely created by the human mind is why I enjoy reading, writing and watching. I simply cannot fathom how Stephen King's mind works. I would think less of his creativity if I found out he used AI. To find out that Middle Earth was created by something other than Tolkien's imagination would be a buzz kill. The world he created while writing The Hobbit and LOTR is absurd to think about. Same goes for Robert Jordan and The Wheel of Time. The sheer amount of information in these series is mind boggling. I can understand why it could be helpful in certain area's but don't like the idea of it being used as a substitute for human creativity.
If you are new to this site, welcome! Drop a comment if you agree or disagree with my take. I would like a chance to understand your thoughts on the topic of AI.
Not sure why, but as I was trying to answer this question, Ben Harper's song, With My Own Two Hands was reverberating in my mind so, I'll leave you with it. Enjoy!
Hello all! It has been a few weeks since I have had an opportunity to post. Life has been busy! While I have had time to check out a few new blogs from IWSG and comment on those that I had already followed, I have been stuck in neutral as it pertains to my own writing. (I will touch on this a bit later.) It hasn't been because of a lack of motivation, just a lack of disposable time. And while this excuse works for me, it was just steamrolled by Elizabeth S. Craig and her piece on the IWSG main page about setting aside fifteen minutes a day to write so, I did. This is what I came up with.
During the past six months, I have experienced many changes. All of you that have tuned in since my return know the story. Having to navigate a different path than I thought I'd be on has been interesting, to say the least. I have settled in to my new norm and it isn't as frightening as I thought it would be. I was not a fan of change before but realize now, that when your plans get derailed, things don't end horribly every time. There will always be something to look forward to. So, in this time of acceptance and growth, I carry that lesson forward. Happiness is mine for the taking but I will need to take it. The immortal words of Shannon Hoon ring true: "Cause when you stop dreamin' it's time to die." This lyric alone provides a profound look in to my current mind state. Before, I had lived in the past and while trying to figure out the "why's", it didn't dawn on me that I was missing out on the present. I wanted it to magically go away with medication. That ended up not working out so well. Throughout life, we walk through the fire and we lose loved ones but we need to move forward in their honor. Not a single person that I've lost would want me to stay stationary in sadness. I can't afford to keep mourning loss. My daughter can't afford it either. "Get busy living or get busy dying!." (Just a little Shawshank reference) So, if I have experienced the worst that this life has to offer and I am still "upright and breathing." (Thanks Corey!) I'll take it!
Now, for the writing thing. Back in 2012ish, I came up with the idea of a story I wanted to tell. I had no experience and had no direction. I simply started tapping away on the keys. After having written a prologue and a chapter or so, I scrapped the writing idea entirely. Over the years, I did miss it and at random times, I would look at the old blog and think, "I should get back in to this." I never acted on my will to do so until recently. During the stories first days, I blindly started writing and it was fun but I quickly realized that I had no plot, no real cast of characters, no twists and no real sense of direction. I was just writing. All of these thoughts hit me smack dab in the tenders and I stopped. I kept up with the blog for a short time but soon after this epiphany, I stopped that also. I am not sure I will ever do more than this and that is okay. I know my original idea is limited. I will never be Stephen King or Tolkien and I get it but it doesn't mean I should stop. Just enjoy the process of creativity and let her rip. Maybe, if I just write like I used to, things will come together, but if not, I will live on. I have taken a break from The War West and started tinkering in poetry and song writing again. Both are some of favorite things to do. When I am comfortable with sharing those things, I'll add some here and see what you all think.
This past weekend, I experienced a weird and unexpected blast from the past and I wanted to share. Saturday, I golfed with my brother in law, my oldest nephew and his buddy, which is like another nephew really. He's been around the family for a long time. But after the outing, we stopped in at the local bar for a couple of beers and a bite. I came to find out that an old band that I used watch back in my early twenties were playing at the exact place I was at. I had no idea. So instead of going home early, I stayed and watched. I am so glad I did. I loved the local music scene in Fort Wayne, IN back then and these dudes were some of my favorites to go see live.
Allow me to introduce The Wailhounds performing Rickety Ol' Ford. I hope you enjoy!
Twelve Years!! Congratulations on keeping this group intact!
As always, I will begin by thanking Alex J. Cavanaugh for starting this hop. I am sure that it is tiring at times, to juggle the many things that go along with creating such a place, all while continuing to add to his own work. He seems to do this with ease. I am truly grateful. Mr. Cavanaugh followed my site long ago and guess who was the first to comment upon my return? Yeah, you know.
The IWSG was created to support those of us that love to write but have insecurities, hang ups, doubts and fears. The writers here offer support and tips to assist in making informed decisions in regard to our work. If you haven't already, join the hop at IWSG. Click the IWSG Sign Up tab under the header and begin reaping the benefits. While you are at it, be sure to check on others and if so inclined, offer support to when needed. It makes a difference, trust me.
Today's question: The IWSG celebrates twelve years today! When did you discover the IWSG, how do you connect and how has it helped you?
I originally came across the IWSG long ago, while it was still in its infancy. Circa 2012. I was (and still am) a novice when it came to blogging. I originally created the HabitualHobbit to shed light on aspects of having mental illness and the negative stigma that one feels when being diagnosed with a disorder. Over time, I garnered a small following of seventyish people that were interested in what I had to say and it emboldened me to keep putting myself out there. Along the way, I came across this group and decided that, if I was to continue, I would benefit from reading the words of such skilled writers. I did not anticipate the amount of warm wishes and tips I would receive, mostly from fellow group members.
After a long hiatus, I decided to enter the fray once more. Armed with more resolve, I sought out the group again. And, I am happy I did.
As always, I will leave you with song. Check out Incubus - Pistola
For those of you that have dared enter this site, I did try to warn you. The tab located on my home page entitled "The Rub/Contact" sums up this blog. It's messy and does not always make for comfortable discussion but you will get all of me, good and bad. My sense of humor can be skewed at times. I can look at myself through a different lens and see humor in my shortcomings and at times, I will be self deprecating but that is okay. This post is a redux from one published long ago, during the beginning stages of this blog. I removed all of the old material from 2012-2013 in an attempt to start with a clean slate. Here is a reincarnated version of the original.
Ophidiophobia is an extreme, overwhelming fear of snakes and yes, I have that. Not sure where this fear came from either. Throughout history, several cultures have myth's related to the serpent. In Norse mythology, Jormungandr, the great serpent of the sea, bit his own tail to surround the earth. When he releases said tail, Ragnarok (The end of the world) will begin and gods like Thor, Odin and Heimdall will perish. Greek mythology tells us of the Gorgons. Three sisters (Medusa, being the most notable) with hair made of snakes, would turn their gaze upon you and your form would turn to stone. Maybe it stems from the biblical story of The Garden of Eden, taught to me so long ago. You know, Satan disguising himself as a serpent, coercing Adam and Eve to partake in the forbidden fruit from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, even after God forbid them to do so. Or maybe, I am not as "in the minority" as I think and a good majority of us have an inbred fear of the nope rope. Any way you slice it, the fear is tangible, for some. This is my take regarding these dangerous little demons from the bowels of hell. Here are just a few examples of what resides here in the good old U.S of A.
We will begin by easing our way into the fray, starting with the Eastern Copperhead (picture below). The Copperhead is a pit viper, and can be found in many areas of the U.S. You will usually find them in heavily wooded areas or near rock formations. These little miscreants are prevalent in southwest Arkansas, where I recently visited on holiday. I didn't happen across any during this recent go around but I have seen them on golf courses in HSV a couple of times. Copperheads inject victims with hemolytic toxin. The venom breaks down red blood cells which will subdue smaller prey but are not normally life threatening to humans, if treated quickly. Even if it doesn't kill you, a Copperhead bite can still make for a crappy day.
This little fellow looks like he was probably pissed at birth.
Next on the board is the Eastern Diamondback Rattler (picture below). Family of origin is Viperidae. Widely known as the longest and heaviest snake found in the U.S., this species of death coil can be found in Southeastern portions of the country, including the Carolina's, Florida, Mississippi, Alabama and into Louisiana. It's venom is a hemotoxin which break down red blood cells (yada, yada) which will disrupt clotting and in some cases, aid in organ degeneration and tissue damage. Fun, huh? I would be remiss if I did not mention that there are over eighty sub species of rattlesnake in the U.S., with the Western Diamondback having the highest toxicity per bite and the highest fatality rate in the states.
EVIL. Pure EVIL.
Finally, we come to the Coral Snake. (Picture below)
Remember, "red touch yellow, kill a fellow. Red touch black, friend of Jack.
These little bastards are a touch different than those mentioned above. The coral snake is a species of Elapid, which include the black mamba, cobra and several species of sea snakes, which will all be mentioned in part two. Venom toxicity is strong with this one but, unlike the examples above, it's mechanism to transfer the juice is much different. See, vipers can unleash mass amounts of venom in a single, quick strike, where the coral snake has much smaller fangs. It will actually latch on to prey and stay in the bite for longer in order inject a lethal dose of neurotoxin. This is much different in the way it attacks the body. Bites are usually less painful but work quicker and paralyze the muscles used for breathing. Coral snakes are docile by nature and will hide or flee before they attack. Most species can be found in southern states with Florida being the hot bed.
So, there you have it. I know it is a small sample size but these are the most common venomous snakes in the States. There are twenty two known species around these parts and most dwell in warmer areas. That is fine by me. Come to think of it, living in northern Indiana isn't that bad after all. I am more likely to bite it being trampled by a buggy filled with Amish than I am any other way. I think I like my chances.
For now, I will leave this here. Be on the lookout in the future for a "part 2" because the scariest snakes live in other countries. I will get in to those another time. My anxiety level is elevated by simply choosing the pictures above so I must get moving.
I would be remiss if I did not thank Alex J. Cavanaugh for starting this group. I have gained so much good information and support during the short time I have been a part of this unbelievable collection of creatives. I simply cannot thank those that have looked in and shared in this journey enough. I am still weaving my way around, introducing myself to those on the list and eventually, I will get through the whole thing.
I have not been able to write much over the last week because I was away on vacation with the family but things are getting back to normal. I plan on visiting more of you on the list, all while adding to my little story.
August 2, 2023 question: Have you ever written something that afterwards you felt conflicted about? If so, did you let it stay how it was, take it out or rewrite it?
To be honest, I experience conflict while crafting every post. It is not easy for me to put myself out there for everyone to see (read). I am constantly typing and deleting and rewriting again, looking for the perfect words to describe my current feelings, whatever they may be. Each piece I create produces a certain amount of stress internally because sometimes, I need to rehash some hurtful memory or circumstance that I would rather not think about. I want the reader to feel my experience. This blog tells my personal story. The mess and all things that come along with it, good and bad.
The same goes for my short story, The War West. I constantly delete and rewrite because I do not want to offend anyone. This may be my story's undoing because it is going to be impossible to complete without rustling some feathers. I guess I will need to deal with negativity when it comes my way.
Cheers to twelve years!! I remember when this group was in it's infancy, way back. I missed so much during my years in the void. I pray that the group continues with the much need support for years to come. It is truly a blessing.
The family vacation has past and it is now time to get back to the daily grind. The trip ended in success and I was able to set my current life struggles aside enough to enjoy some much needed time away. I must preface the following by admitting I am not a photographer. The pictures below were taken on my cell phone and do not completely depict the beauty of the Ouachita Mountains in Western Arkansas but it will give you a general idea. No rain threatened at any time during our week long stay. The mornings were hazy but as the day progressed, the clouds would dissipate, letting through a clear blue sky with little cloud cover.
The view from my deck.
The picture above was the view I would take in every day upon waking up. I would sit on the deck most mornings to simply breathe in fresh air and surround myself with the pristine beauty of the area. During these moments, I was able to sit quietly and meditate. There was very little noise. I found that aspect of the area most pleasing.
Thursday, we rented a pontoon and cruised Lake Balboa in The Village. From my understanding, Balboa is the largest man-made lake in the area. Again, blue skies, very few clouds and intense heat. It was pushing 100 degrees on this day.
The golf courses in the community are spectacular. I played four courses throughout the week and not one hole laid flat. The picture above does not tell you the entire story. You would need to see it with your own eyes. My daughter, who is not a golfer, enjoyed the views. She rode along with us on two occasions. She has a keen eye and takes beautiful pictures. A talented photographer in her own right, she enjoyed snapping action shots of us all while taking our swings.
Friday, our last day before the long trip home, we visited Hot Springs. We stayed in The Village most nights but decided to take a ride thirty minutes south to town. The mural above caught my eye. It was the last picture I would take on the trip.
I have settled back into normal mode already. I miss the area and hope to visit again. Every one of us has a place that feels right when we are there. This little bit in Arkansas is mine. But like most good things, it came to an end, at least for now.
I hope that this finds you well. I know it is not much but I wanted to at least share a couple things.
