The Noise

 "There is more to life, than increasing it's speed." - Gandhi

I must remind myself of this quote on a daily basis.

Currently, I find myself wanting to get things completed quickly. I want closure to the past so I can get on with living in the present and maybe even plan some things for the future. I am in a rush to change my current circumstances and feel that things are simply, not moving quickly enough. I regularly forget that life is a marathon, not a sprint. I should be relishing my time here and not concern myself with the speed of things. This is new for me, as in the past, I had no comprehension of time. I simply did not care, for the most part, on completing tasks. This new found motivation is killing me.

It's time to slow down and allow things to unravel at their own speed.

"Ups and downs in life are very important to keep us going, because a straight line even in an ECG means we are not alive." - Ratan Tata

The passing month's have truly been a rollercoaster ride filled with ups and downs. Lately, I have digested the many changes that have taken place and it has been a lot to take in and I am wearing thin. I experience a slight reprieve when I lay to rest at night. As contradicting as this may seem, listening to music as I prepare myself for rest helps block the outside noise. It helps me reset. Hearing what is being conveyed through song is my attempt to drown out the noise of everyday life. I am still. I allow these words to latch on and take me somewhere far away. It is how I choose to unwind after a long, stressful day. I find that the rollercoaster becomes a flat, straight road, out in the middle of nowhere and I am the only living vessel on it. I imagine the stars overhead. A cool wind swirling past my face as I drift off to sleep. I yearn for that feeling every single evening. I can simply "escape" the daily grind. I am finally at peace, even it only lasts for a couple of hours.

The world is filled with noise. It is an assault on my senses, at times. The constant ringing of telephones, the annoying little bong that notifies me of an incoming email. The mashing of keyboards. The sound of a rickety air conditioner trying to keep the building cool. The discussions of twenty-somethings, complaining about how life is unfair. Every person I speak to has a problem. It is draining. That is my work day in a nutshell.

Music and writing are my retreat and both allow my mind an opportunity to heal.

"Nowhere can man find a quieter or more untroubled retreat than in his own soul." - Marcus Aurelius

I have found that I am most relaxed when I dive inward for brief moments during my day. My thoughts and ambitions have clarity. The noise simply fades away and I am alone. I am able to sift through the emotions and the craziness surrounding me. Those short spans of time help me navigate my world.

Like A Stone -  Audioslave