Monday, June 27, 2011

Someone Got Some Splainin' To Do !

I must admit, I am somewhat shocked.

Ladies, I will break out that speedo picture in just a bit, but I must confess, I'm not much to look at. In fact, I am hideous enough that my wife, God bless her soul, has on numerous occasions, envisioned David Beckham in place of me, while getting jiggy with it drinking coffee and discussing our plans for the day. I understand, I am no longer the man that she married. I am but a shell of that guy. I am nothing more than a big, clumsy, dopey, Enginerd that has been chewed up and spat out by father time. But, I digress.

So, yesterday, I compulsively went about my normal routine. Logged into Blogger, yada-yada, and everything was in it's place. I had (47) followers, (that had not changed for quite sometime) a few new hits, but no tagger-onners. (I don't care all that much because I have already exceeded my expectations. I had (45) more followers than I thought I would have, so, the rest are an added bonus.) But then, something went haywire. I was/am at work and since I my work load (ha, ha. I said load.) is currently slow, I have been able to check in often. Upon reentry, I noticed that the number of minions had increased. I now sat at 48. Stacey at Love the Lacquer had joined the fray. How cool. A wonderfully funny gal from Texas had decided to take the "red pill" and find out how far the rabbit hole goes. But wait, that was only the beginning. While in mid post, a 49th had drunkenly staggered into my mass-ah-cree. Enter Ellen Lloyd at Defenestrated Feet. Following Ellen, came number 50, Liss at Chaos Pie, and after her, who would appear? Number 51, Shanda and A Pause on The Path. Now, what the Sam Hell is going on ...of course, come on in number 52, Gabi at Crazy Socks & Ninja Bunnies. Welcome.

Did I miss something?
Did I get BON'd? Nope. Am I the featured Blogger on s30p? Yeah, whatever. Or, did the judges running Blogger Idol 2011 realize a tragic "hanging chad" incident had taken place and, upon re tallying the votes, found that, I had indeed, garnered a sufficient amount of votes and in turn, necessitated that I be added to "the Top 12 "? Nope. Notta Chance.

Now, what gives? If I am going to pull out the Speedo picture, somebody need 'fess up' on the double. Liss just began following me, and if I loose her already, I will be one pissed off hobbit. I mean, I am happier than...say,

A unicorn, shooting a rainbow out of his/her ars.

Mynxy, did you pull some strings?
Jenny, how smitten are you with me, really? Smitten enough to add followers?????
Drake, what? You think that just because I'm an American, I can't start some shit?
Jewels? Becca? HAVEN?
Randy?
Mom?
Dad?
I best be hearing some answers soon. Until then, I will honor my word. Here you go Liss (& Ladies) Don't all come a' runnin' at the same time, now. I'm only one man.




17 comments:

Gabi said...

Uh oh.
I guess I should explain.
This is gonna be awkwaaard.

Oh. Wait.

I think I just clicked on a link somewhere. I wasn't even stalking. Well, I guess I was creeping a bit.

coughimkindofcreepysometimescough

Haven said...

::laughs:: You're a stitch ib. I got a bunch of new followers too. I do wonder where they came from .

ib said...

Gabi, I must confess, I like creepy stalker chicks. My life would be so dull if I was not constantly worried about chick's peeping at me through my window at night.

Haven, Thank you. I have to say, you are the coolest Sith around, no question. Now, MAKE ME A MUFFIN !!!! please.

Pearson Report said...

Dear ib...my, my, my aren't you just the little midnight snack!

Yum, yum...love the body transplant...if only it were that easy, eh!

Now...I'm remiss in my commenting skills these days, and you are but one of one that I am breaking my writing fast for and leaving the much sought after "Pearson Report" comment here just for you, my dear, adorable ib!

And, regardless of the Blog Idol outcome you are already the winner...I said so, so there!

I'll be back (said Terminator style, only with a smile),
Jenny

thinkellen said...

I'd first like to say that I rather object to speculations on my sobriety. =P I assure you that I fully present and aware of my actions when following your blog. XD

And that unicorn? Beautiful. Just beautiful. =D

ib said...

Jenny, you are the best. I feel as if I owe you something.

Ellen, I meant no offense. I am, in no way, questioning your sobriety. It is mine that need be worried about. Sorry. I owe you a beer. First round is on me.

Jewels said...

If I did get you new followers I refuse to say sorry. I may or may not have tweeted that there would be a man in a green speedo on a blog post soon. Okay...I didn't. Anyway...don't question it just go with it...which is what I said to the men in that green speedo! hello, sir. hehehe.

ib said...

Jewels, that man in the green speed is me. I have been chisled by the hands of angels. I do, however, remember that day, when you told me to "just go with it."

Liss said...

Nee hee hee first, I've never heard the term "getting jiggy with it." Cracked me up!

Hmm.... I got a few peeps as well, but I blame it to the lack of Facebooking now-a-days. People are now moving towards blogging.

And, of course, I WON A SPEEDO PICTURE! I'm printing it out and putting it on my wall. My roommate will be pleased.

ib said...

Wonderful. Plaster me all over this world.

Mynx said...

Sweetness, as much as I would love to take credit for the sudden influx I dont think I can. In fact, I could be a little jeolous of the fact that I now have to share you with even more ladies. It must have been the promise of the speedos and if you keep posting more photos like that I might just have to feature you instead of my monthly fireman.

Mynx said...

I was going to email you but I cant find it so I will ask you here.
Would you be interested in doing a guest post for me?
I want to showcase the guys during July.
Email me.

stacey said...

It must have been the hanging chads.

Or perhaps it was I stumbling about blogland late at night. It's happened. On occassion. Sometimes.

Now that I know that there are speedo pics here, though, I'll be back and I'll be sure to let all my friends know.

Jennifer said...

Stacey told me about the speedo so I am here for a peek.....nice! We call them banana hammocks where I come from. Congrats on all the new followers. The pressure is on to keep us all entertained.

ib said...

And, keep you all entertained, I will, Jennifer. There is more where (that) speedo pic from. It just takes me a little bit to Photosh....uh, I mean, get them developed.

Thank you Stacey.

becca said...

i'm thinking that someone let it out that you were wearing a gren speedo and the ladies couldn't help themselfs. Wish i could take credit but like Mynx i'm jealous of having to share you with more people. enjoy it the numbers will only grow bigger. hugs

ib said...

I am no prize ladies, but I had a funny thunk. I should have a battle royal, consisting of my girls, punching each blog box until there is only one standing. Like, Jerry Springer.