Hello and welcome to the Habitual Hobbit. If you are a familiar, you will already know that Wednesday around here is Wushi Finger Wednesday and if you are a noob, you also, now, already know that it is indeed, Wushi Finger Wednesday. For those of you that are noob's and do not know now what WFW is, it is called an acronym. This specific acronym means Wushi Finger Wednesday, and on said day, I rant about someone(s) or something(s) that really chap my posterior. If you are like most of my readers, you are now dumber for having subjected yourself to my blog. And yet, you have decided to stay and prove that you have what it takes to go to D. That being said, "Let's Get It Started In Ha".
Wednesday, February 9th, 2011
So, let me get this straight. You make millions of dollars, playing a Game. You are employed by one of the most storied franchises in the history of professional sports. You make more money during the course of one season than I would have made IF I began working in my current position immediately after I exited the womb, stayed gainfully employed for 70 straight years, accrued no debt because every single thing that I had gained was handed to me and...... I was able to accomplish this feat for 3.5 consecutive LIVES. I will admit, I am somewhat of a pessimist but, seriously? You are a household name. You have had "relations" with at least three prominent actresses. You have been seen in public with high priced and well known call-girls and/or madam's. You have admitted to using P.E.D.'s. and suffered little or no consequences. And, you have experienced ALL OF THIS while, most likely living with the delusion that this is ALL owed to you because of all of your hard work.
And, if this is the story of your life, YOU.....WOULD.....BE.....WHO?
That's right ladies and gentlemen, you would be Alex Rodriguez, 3rd baseman of the New York Yankees.
Why did I pick this tool, you ask? Credentials? Here is an example credential. Allow the following comment found via Wikipedia, to further enlighten you with an example of criteria, from which, I found damning in this case.
Candice Houlihan, a Boston-area hairdresser who previously worked as a stripper, told the Boston Herald that she and Rodriguez had sex on two occasions in 2004 when Rodriguez was in town playing against the Boston Red Sox. Houlihan also told the Globe of her liaisons with Rodriguez, and the supermarket tabloid said she had passed a lie detector test. The day after Cynthia Rodriguez filed for divorce from Alex Rodriguez in 2008, Houlihan said Rodriguez' wife "did the right thing," adding, "a leopard doesn't change his stripes. Good for her. I think she's doing the smart thing. And she'll probably get tons of cash."
Please note: The competition this week was fierce and I could have made a case for a plethora of candidates but A-Fraud just has a way of donkey punching my most irritable areas.
"Aaaah, I feeeeeel nice, like sugar and spice."
See, even The Pope agrees. He even went out and bought him a little sump, sump.
"Listen man, the rest of the team is starting to get weirded out concerning your, umm, uniform??"
The Black Eyed Peas - for butchering the entire halftime show.
Christina Aguilera - for her nauseating rendition of the Star Spangled Banner.
On a positive note, I want to congratulate Volkswagen for what I thought was by far, the best Super Bowl commercial this year. The Darth Vader kid was classic. If you missed it, check it out below.